What Measures a Good Life
“What do you do for work? That is to say, is your existence as justified as the rest of ours?” Me? Oh, my job’s REAL WORK. The hardest, actually. In fact, I suffer more over it than pretty much anyone else. And it’s REAL IMPORTANT too. Listen to my technical sounding title. Don’t these words that make no sense outside my particular field impress you? I suppose my company did just make it up, but I bet you think it sounds fancy, especially the way I rattled it off.
“What does it entail,” you ask? Here’s the ambiguous, nothing-burger pat response we rehearse for these very moments. Certainly you’re impressed now. Can’t you see how apathetic and resentful, yet proud I sound? I’m just so overworked, but that should impress you too. I’m basically a martyr for my family. I wish they would stop worrying about how “not there” I am for/with them.
They have more money than I ever had growing up; why aren’t they more grateful to have such a good provider in their lives? We’re having steak for dinner, you ingrates. Now sit at the table and be present with me, while I talk about all the things that should be better than the way that they are. Woe as me. If only the world were filled with such hard workers as myself.
Rosa Parks once said, “Each person must live their lives as a model for others.” This isn’t the way, but it seems like the dominant social convention.
We aren’t just pointing the finger, either. Even we who have broken away to pave our own path get caught up justifying our means of living.
Well, what’s the purpose of your walk? A good one. Well, how many states have you done? A bunch. Well, how many miles do you average? Enough to constantly struggle against repetitive motion injuries. Hm… well, I heard about this one guy that does this many this fast.
No one would be very happy if we who live intentionally, turned the interrogation on its head and started asking about REAL, HUMAN VIRTUES.
“What do you find purpose in? Where do you derive your meaning from?” My family and relationships. “Well, how much time do you actually get to spend with them? When was the last time you were all present with each other? Without screens, food, or alcohol?
Oh, I see… well, how much meaning do you derive from your work? What would you have if you were stripped of title, money, vehicle, or home? If someone followed you around for a week, what would THEY say you value? Do the people you love feel prioritized?
If you died right now, would you be happy with the way you’re living? Would you be happy with your life choices? Or are you putting off REALLY living for tomorrow, when you’re old and retired, after you’ve developed such terrible neurological habits you can’t even find the joy you’ve been banking on?
Can you sit still for an hour without anything but your thoughts? When’s the last time you tried? Can you direct your attention at will, away from rumination and toward empathy and love? How often are you mesmerized by the magic of the universe vs how often you’re griping about the opinions and actions of others?
Instead, how about we all cut out the elitist one-upmanship, meet each other where we’re at, and go have some fun together.
