A Will Strong Enough to Suffer

   This is what we think about when we suffer. We think of Jesus, when tempted by the devil. What a state one must be in after so many days fasted! We think of his denial of comfort, power, and material in the service of something greater at the most trying time. We think of a will strong enough to suffer the most excruciating pain for what is believed in.

   We think of Buddha who, 5 centuries prior, was said to have fasted for so long that you could see his spine through his belly in certain positions! We think of his temptation under the Bodhi tree by “The Evil One.” Māra started with threat and force, then sends their daughters to entice Buddha’s desires, later moving to doubt temptation and identity temptation. Māra tries to lure him into becoming something special, a role, a “self.” But Buddha saw through it all, 

   “Craving is your army… Discontent… Hunger and thirst… Sloth… Fear… Doubt… Hypocrisy… Gain, fame, and honor… by conquering them, one gains bliss.” (a rough paraphrasing of longer scripture)

   We think of Epictetus, born a slave, a slave who just might have conquered most of those things. Property under Roman law, Epic titties was treated as an object that could be beaten or broken at any time. His leg was twisted until it snapped and all he reportedly said was that it would break if they kept twisting it. 

   He went on to teach that nothing external, not pain, chains, reputation, or even freedom actually belongs to us. Only our judgments and perspectives do. True freedom is only found within. 

   We think of Laozi, who is believed to have been a keeper of archives, had enough watching the state chase power and ceremony, and simply walked away from everything. No reform movement or confrontation. He just walked away from the politics entirely, rode west toward the border, wrote a short text when asked, and disappeared. Actually, the whole Taoist religion might have only started because as Laozi is “peacing out” one of the guards is like, “If you’re going to peace out from the world, leave something behind for us.”

   This guy refused status, influence, and to be useful to an empire that was excited to put him to work, wandering off to possibly die in the wilderness in exchange for clarity, simplicity, and being at one with The Way. And he inspired others we’ve come to think of, like Zhuangzi.

   We think of Zhuangzi, or at least the story about him, when he was offered an official post in government. Prestige, security, rank. He compared it to an honored turtle shell kept in a shrine and asked whether the turtle would rather be dead and worshipped or alive and dragging its tail through the mud. Guess which one he picked. 

   We think of Ashtavakra, speaking to a king and cutting straight through the whole mechanic of striving, saying you are not bound and never were; the moment you identify yourself as the doer or the sufferer you’ve already stepped into the trap. Rather than funneling anyone down some twisty spiritual path, he bluntly claimed that freedom is simply the refusal to identify with what happens to the body and mind. Let go and watch. 

   So many came before us to show us the way. So-what if we are separated by time and legend? Suffering is experience. Let it wash over us. Let us watch with open eyes. Let us neither cling nor crave. Let us observe the majesty of the mud, never fettering ourselves to the idol of comfort.